What did We Find at the Airport?

It is too much for words, so I am not going to try to use them to describe the majesty. Please, behold:








Alright, take a moment to really absorb what's depicted above.

Okay. There are a number things worth noting, and a few questions:

• A cactus with sunglasses appears on every completed page
• The cactus with sunglasses is not the narrator
• The credited author is Willowbelly Conbreast. Willowbelly Conbreast!
• The Gliding Spider Wheelchair: organic or not?
• While obviously incomplete, the book is stapled and numbers 30 pages
• What is the significance of the Canoe Ride?
• In the first non-cover illustration the narrator appears to be holding open his coat, which contains scissors, a hammer, and an unidentified object that could be either wrenches or a plasma lamp.

I encourage any and all readers to share their thoughts/speculations/reactions about/regarding/to this remarkable find. Thank you. YOU'RE WELCOME


p.s. - or - I can't stop thinking about this.

We googled everything in this text - Willowbelly Conbreast, gliding-spider-wheelchairs, hidden shows at bonfires, Eh·o'nites, canoe ride uncertainty - all to no avail. We picked apart every page looking for clues, debating aspects of every illustration, and questioning the motives and reliability of our narrator. I know that this story has remarkable potential, and I hope that by some internet miracle we are able to establish contact with Mr. or Ms Conbreast. If such hopes go unfulfilled, however, can I in good conscience continue what has been started?

More Evidence of My Brother's Existence

Listen: My brother has graduated law school, and in honor of the occasion I went to New York and sat through the reading of a number of names. Photographs were also taken. This is one of the few instances in which my brother is not making a terrible face in a family picture. I know that in the past the existence of my brother has come under a lot of scrutiny and skepticism, and I hope that any readers' lingering doubts are finally put to rest.

In other news, This is what my extended family looks like, in case you were super curious, and this guy's dad made a really excellent speech.

I am on a Bus with The Internet

The Mind Boggles.

It is going to New York though, so it's far from perfect.

A Brief and Triumphant Return pt 4

I've either come a long way or no way at all

P.S. I have one last thing.

A Brief and Triumphant Return pt 3

Etc



[Special Thanks to Muffin MacGuffin for his relentless approval]

Sorry But Seriously

I hate to be a guy who mindlessly posts links to Things he saw on the internet, but this is too important not to share with the 4 people who read this. So: Adorable Robot, for real this time.

Now you know, you're welcome

A Brief and Triumphant Return pt 2

Here is another comic, it is different from the one posted yesterday in that it is almost all words. Also it has a few colors. This is by no means an indication that it is any better, because it almost certainly is not.

This is This Blog's 100th Post

The weather is perfect outside.

A Brief and Triumphant Return Pt 1

Listen: this past academic year I did a few more Abandoned Astronaut comics. I don’t know if they are any good or not; I don’t hate them yet, which means that they must not be absolutely terrible. The trouble is that I have long since run out of ideas for the character that make any sense and/or are funny, but anytime I am presented with a blank sheet of notebook paper and a pen I will wind up drawing the guy, though it is remarkably rare for anything to come of it. Also, a lot has changed in terms of How Things Are Now compared to How Things Where Then, where Then is the period when I did these all the time. This makes it difficult to do the same kind of stuff, and I’m probably less likely to share this sort of thing nowadays than I was then. However, I am in a generous and blogging mood, so here they come. I think there are four, one of which remains unfinished. You know the drill, one-a-day until there aren’t any left.

“Sorry” to the handful who hate these, and “you’re welcome” to the two who used to like them a lot.

Opinon Poll: Do you Hate This or Not?

This is a logo I made at the request of my dad, who, as you may already know/have made jokes about, is a urologist. Does it make sense to you? Do you see What I Did There?


P.S. Here is a logo for a pretend soda that doesn't exist (yet).

Follow-Up Information about The Lousy Hour

Listen: I know that a lot of you (there are not actually a lot of you reading this if Google Analytics is to be trusted - and it is) did not like The Lousy Hour. I know that a couple of you (literally, like 2) said that you liked it because of Obligations You Have To Those Involved. I get that, Really. Nevertheless, I thought it was worth mentioning that last Friday my colleague stopped by the Desk I Get Paid To Sit Behind to give me a confusing object. I will describe this object: it is a MiniDV tape, the kind you would use in a pretty regular camcorder, only it had been spray painted gold, and a handwritten label that read "The Lousy Hour, Miles Donovan" had been put on the the tape. On the other side, written on the cardboard sleeve of the tape's case was "best sitcom, 07-08." I will not take a picture of it for you to see, sorry.

Apparently they came from one of the higher-ups at TUTV.

Listen: at first I thought it was an extremely silly thing, and to some degree I still do, for a few reasons: 1) the show is not a sitcom, 2) the show is not the best anything, and 3) the show was made in part as an act of self-serving vengeance for how poorly-received our previous project was, despite how hard we had worked on it. But now that I've thought about it for a while, I realize that it probably took someone a good 5 minutes to spray paint that tape, not to mention the 20 minutes and five plus dollars it no doubt took to buy the spray paint in the first place. They did that for us. That was nice of them. They were nice, even though we did a bad job. We got an award. That never happens in real life.

Information about an Earthquake

Listen: an Earthquake killed maybe ten thousand people in China yesterday. Ten Fucking Thousand People. Do you get that? That is so many people to god damn die in an earthquake. That is Insane.